It only seems appropriate this week of the ROLEX, that it would be the perfect time to continue and share more on dealing with fear. It is perfect not only because of the fear factor involved in competing in the Rolex, but because I had a chance to speak with Tamie Smith, international event rider, U.S. Developing Rider recipient, Rolex rider, long listed rider for the 2008 Olympics (2012 Olympic Event Team rider), and the list goes on!
I contacted Tamie through Face Book based on knowledge of her and her excellent reputation through friends. She is one of the best in a sport that is considered one of the most difficult equine sports in the world, both for horse and rider. She has competed in some of the most grueling of those competitions. I swallowed my pride and fear and bucked up to write her a simple note requesting a visit since she is based locally for me. A couple of days later, she surprised me by not only accepting my request, but saying that she'd love to meet me. I think I was grinning ear to ear and strutting around for days after that! Over the course of a week an appointment was arranged and I was off with just me and my designated driver, Robyn Hamblin on hand (the broken arm made it difficult to navigate winding roads). Being an hour late did not put either me or my ride in the best of moods, we were worried; what if she just sent us home? What if she wasn't even at the barn anymore? Luckily, she was at the barn and was still more than happy to see us.
While at the barn we were able to see her top notch chiropractor in action and see her developing four star mount Bubbles @ Brickey, as well as her talented daughter and her mount. Throughout the chiropractor's visit my driver, Robyn and I were party to several pearls of wisdom shared by both the chiropractor and Tamie; some of which I am still processing for future use. After a productive hour admiring her very lovely barn setting, and drooling over her soft fluffy footing, she was heading off to lunch. Unexpectedly we were given an invite to go out to lunch with her and her crew... Can you believe I almost said "NO"? Who does that??? After a very, very short debate as to whether or not to call in sick to work... (hey, I had no brace or cast on my broken arm, I can't work with kids!!! Really!!) After this gut wrenching struggle with my conscience, we hopped in the car and followed her out to an old town Murrieta eatery.
Enjoying a salad, and good company we swapped horse stories and horse people stories. Through the course of story telling, I gained an even deeper respect for a woman who has looked fear in the face and taken it on at full speed. Her story about last year's Rolex event was both eye opening and brave. This is a woman who has faced her fears and challenged the odds her whole life in many areas and WON, but these are stories for another time!
Fear, this is what I had come for... The first thing she shared was the title of a book that she recommends to all of her riders called Psycho Cybergenics by Maxwell Maltz. She shared that this is a book that had changed her life and she encourages her event riders to read it to help them move to the next level in their lives and riding. This book is not a riding book per se, but it addresses areas that riders face on a daily basis, it is better described as a book on the theory of mind, and the subconscious power over our lives. The book was written in the 1960s, but is still recommended and sold around the world. It was around before "The Secret", and was way ahead of its time.
She explained that fear is based on either illogical things, like scapegoating, or a lack of preparation and/or planning. She continued on to say that fear is often based on our inability to control the things in our lives. She followed it up with the fact that this is where practice and preparation fit in; that gaining experience and confidence over a specific skill provides the feeling of control, which most riders have a need to feel while they are riding. She also went on to say that most riders have a tendency to be control freaks, and it often stems from the fear of not really being in control over an almost 1 ton animal. She reminded us that the subconscious mind does not process negations like: no, not, never, won't etc. Therefore, when a rider thinks to themselves "I will not fall off", the subconscious hears "I will fall off" and strives to make that thought a reality. Because of the way the subconscious mind process things, it is best to phrase things in a positive way, like "I will ride the course perfectly", " I am a solid rider and I will stay on the horse". These types of statements are better at programming our mind. Her closing recommendation was to read the book, and reflect on our lives to decide where our fears were really coming from what kinds of statements we were creating for ourselves, and where we wanted to go with our riding futures.
What I found the most interesting aspect of the interview was how much all of her advice and information paralleled that of other top level riders. The second thing that I realized was that fear is a highly personal thing, and that knowledge is the most important tool to use to overcome it. Heeding this advice, I have decided to re-evaluate my life and my goals to see what is stopping me from reaching my goals of riding at the Grand Prix levels. What are the sacrifices that I might be afraid of making to get there and then set up a reasonable and realistic plan. The fact that when I shared these dreams with Tamie she didn't laugh at me really boosted my confidence (and yes she has seen our rescue videos)! :)
THANK YOU Tamie Smith, for your time, wisdom and kindness in sharing your experience with an amateur rider with big dreams. Words cannot express how much this impacted my view of riding and my belief in myself. I have my copy of the Psycho Cybernetics book on its way!
See you in the Ring!
Crystal
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